Start ins Leben

Then he became angry. His son had told him my story. "What kind of fool runs away from a good father? What kind of fool throws away a comfortable life? I wouldn't sail with you again for a thousand pounds! You bring misfortune! You cause death!"

His words hurt me. But I said nothing. I had too much pride to admit that he was right. He talked on. "Remember my words. If you don't go home, you will experience catastrophe after catastrophe. The curse of your father will follow you. You will suffer until you wish you were dead."

We parted. I never saw them again. I had money in my pocket from the kind people of Yarmouth. I could go home to York. Or I could go to London and find another ship. The choice was mine. But shame made my decision for me.

How could I go home? Everyone would laugh at me. "There is the boy who ran away to sea!" they would say. "A storm and he came home crying!" I could not bear this disgrace. My pride was stronger than my common sense. That is the madness of youth.

We are not ashamed to do wrong. But we are ashamed to do it right. We are not ashamed to be fools. But we are ashamed to become wise. So I went to London. On the street I fought with myself. But pride won every argument.

In London I stayed for a while. The memory of the storm began to fade. My fear became weaker. My desire for adventure became stronger. I thought less about home. I thought less about my father's tears. I thought less about God's warnings.

Finally I made my choice. I would find another ship. I would try again. I would prove that I was not a coward. I would show everyone that I could be a sailor. I was the biggest fool who ever lived. And I would pay dearly for my stupidity.